What girl does not dream of a fabulous love story with a rapidly developing plot where everything is only good and sweet, like fruit syrup? What kind of man does not want to meet a worthy woman, pass all the initial stages of perceiving each other, and immediately proceed to the practical deeds both in bed and in everyday life? Such people make up the majority. But is it worth to speed up a relationship? After all, building romantic relationships between a guy and a lady is an exciting process that goes over some stages of development. And each loving couple do it in their own way. So, let’s consider why a fast relationship can be dangerous and how to know if a relationship is moving too fast.
Relationship Moving Too Fast: What Does This Mean?
The rapid development of relationships is when a person has not yet managed to understand what they want from a partner and a relationship in general, but something begins to happen between them and their partner. It happens that loving couples are so addicted to each other that they miss some stage of relationship development. For example, when people register on a dating site to meet single ladies, get acquainted with someone, and begin to live together almost immediately.
Of course, everybody has ideas about how relationships should develop. After all, each person is an individual who has certain needs, desires, and life goals. In a relationship, men and women manifest themselves in different ways. For some people, there is no clear framework of how to build relationships with the opposite sex, and they simply go along with the tide. And others adhere to certain principles of the development of romantic relations.
Main Reasons Why Your Relationship Is Moving Too Fast
Now, when you know what it means when a relationship is moving too fast, you should find out the main reasons that can make your love-affair to develop too quickly.
Lack of borders
Personal borders are the restrictions people set to show others how they can and cannot behave with them. In strong and happy relationships, loving couples can discover and respect the personal boundaries of each other. So, if you lack personal borders at the very beginning of a relationship, it may cause the rapid development of your romantic relationships. It can be compared to a car which scorches along the road without stopping – you gather speed until you fall into panic or frustration.
Relational addiction means that you are striving to start a romantic relationship because it makes you feel more cheerful and alive and brightens your life. It even can come to the point that you look through the pictures of single girls and feel the urge to meet a decent girl. This is a state when you seem to be unable to live without someone else. If you have a penchant for addictions, then a loved one can be the very “high” you want to get. Besides, other people can become your “substitute addiction,” for example, in case you have recently kicked another habit, such as smoking, alcohol, or drugs.
Misunderstanding and rejection of oneself
Sometimes, it is very difficult to identify the fine line between yourself and your partner when a love relationship is just beginning, so you want to become utterly absorbed in your beloved. It speaks of the fact that when you get acquainted with someone, you quickly adapt to their ideas, interests, and beliefs. Or it can indicate that you confide others so much that you begin to tie yourself into knots and experience misunderstanding and rejection of yourself. If you do not know how to sort out the feelings, you cannot decide on what you want from a relationship. Consequently, it may cause the rapid development of relations.
In What Cases Fast Relationship Could Be Dangerous?
When you fall in love with a person, you want to plunge into the tender feelings and forget about everything else. But the rapid development of relations has both advantages and obvious disadvantages that you should know in advance. So, in what cases a fast relationship could be dangerous? When you should be worried a relationship is moving too fast?
In a fast relationship, people do not have time to get to know each other properly. A man is a huge bunch of secrets even for himself. So, it takes months and years to know a person quite well. It is important to find out about the past, the interests of a person, and the subtleties of their relationship with parents and friends before plunging into a romantic relationship. Moreover, you need to know the character of a person, as well as their worldview and habits. This is especially important for those who are going to live together.
At the beginning of a relationship, a person interacts not with a partner, but rather with their fantasies about the loved one, with their ideal image. After all, in the first couple of months of a romantic relationship, you are driven by emotions. In this case, a fast relationship can be especially dangerous. Therefore, it is better to get over such a “storm” without living under the same roof with a person you love. Later, when you come to know the person’s personality better, you can think about living together.
Main Signs That Relationships Are Moving Too Fast
Is a relationship moving too fast? How fast should your relationship develop? There is no right answer to this question. Some couples prefer to stretch moments of intimacy, moving closer gradually, while others act under the principle of "all at once." It all depends on your personal preferences and inclinations. However, there are several universal signs on how to tell if a relationship is moving too fast.
You lack personal space
It is one of the most obvious signs a relationship is moving too fast. It seems that a loved one is not ready to sacrifice a mere minute spent with you. Your beloved one fills all your free time with themselves, and you begin to feel as if it is becoming a little stuffily. Of course, you are flattered that the partner calls and writes to you every hour, but it quickly starts to bother you. All people need time for themselves – and only for themselves. So, if you lack personal space, it is time to let your partner know about it. But do it carefully and tenderly if you want to preserve your relationship.
You completely trust a loved one for no reason
Of course, trust is an important component of a romantic relationship, but it is so only if you have already been dating a person for some time. You may think, “This person gave me no reason to distrust them, so why to worry?” But look at the situation on the other way around: trust is something that needs to be deserved. If a new acquaintance did not do anything to make you understand, “Yes, this is the one and only person I need, they will always be there for me,” then what kind of trust can we speak about? You draw conclusions basing just on words of a little-known person, nothing good will come of it.
Your partner urgently wants to introduce you to their family
Does your partner try to acquaint you with their relatives; however, you are absolutely not ready to bake pies in the company of their mother? This is one of the red flags a relationship is moving too fast. If you have such a problem, try to explain your beloved one that for you, an acquaintance with their parents is not a banal visit with a cake, but an important step in a relationship for which you need to be ready. First of all, let the partner at least tell you something about their family. At a personal acquaintance (sometimes it will, nevertheless, take place), it will be much easier for you to get along with their relatives if you prepare in advance and learn something about these people.
Your partner actively plans your joint future
Has a loved one already planned out your joint future and even considered the names for your future children? Stop-stop, you met each other just a week ago! If you think that talking of “let's get married” scare only men, then you are mistaken – that is a thing of the past. Women are also afraid of perseverance and urgency, especially those representatives of the weaker sex who are used to living for the moment.
You feel tired
Fatigue with relationships is a bad sign. Perhaps you should take a couple of steps back and think about what could have gone wrong. No, it does not mean that you fell out of love with a person with whom you are building a romantic relationship. Pure and simple, all people need a little reset from time to time. So, you should take a small break from each other, and after that proceed with building the relationship at a deliberate pace.
Ways to Slow Down Relationships That Move Too Quickly
Sometimes, it may seem to you that relationships are developing too quickly in an emotional or physical aspect. In this case, you should not forget that the main thing in a romantic relationship is a mutual agreement between partners. You do not have to abide by the circumstances just to please a loved one. What to do when a relationship is moving too fast? If you want to bring harmony to the relationship, consider these helpful tips on how to slow down relationships that move too quickly.
Plan only what you can implement
Live in harmony with yourself and stay true to your beliefs. Do not give consent to be in a certain place in ten months if you are not sure what you are going to do next weekend! Some people feel more comfortable when they do not have neat plans, while others prefer to plan every step, and it is absolutely natural. If you are in a romantic relationship with a person who looks happier than you, then you need to find a balance between your comfort zones.
Find time for yourself
It is very easy to feel shattered if you do not have personal space. It does not signify that you should break up a relationship with someone you love, you should just take a little time for yourself every day to consider your life and prescind from your beloved. Thus, you will understand that a direct assessment of your own self makes you feel much better in a relationship and helps control it.
Therefore, try to spend more time with your friends without a loved one. Do not forget about friendship, even if you are dating someone. Your partner should not stick around all day long.
Spend the weekend separately
If you feel like a relationship is moving too fast, try to leave the city for a couple of days so that you have a chance to refresh your thoughts and consider the importance of the ongoing events. What to do? Everything that makes you feel happier! Visit a new city, climb the mountains, go camping, or just go upon the road and admire wonderful landscapes. Find a place where you can clear your mind from unnecessary thoughts and doubts.
Try not to sleep together
Do not sleep with your partner or invite them to your place for the night. Everything becomes much more serious when you start sleeping in the same bed, especially when it becomes a habit. The closer you get to each other, the more your lives become entangled. The same relates to a live-in relationship. Living together, especially if one of you is not fully aware of what is happening, makes things much more serious. Therefore, consider whether it’s time to take your relationship to the next level.
Highlight problem areas
Think through particular things that cause you inconvenience and try to find a way to fix or avoid such problems in the future. Everything can become much simpler if your reaction to certain situations changes radically. For example, if you feel fixated on a loved one when you do not see each other for several days, find a way to meet your beloved more often or ask them to devote more time to communicate with you during the separation.
Relationships are created by two people who have decided to be together. Do not blame them if their romance is gathering speed and rushing fast. Each person has a choice on how to mold life and build romantic relationships. The point is that a couple of loving people realize that their relationship is moving too fast and feel quite good about it. So, if your life goals, plans, and beliefs are similar, you love each other and feel wonderful together – feel free to continue building relationships. Good luck!