Today we are going to talk about the institution of marriage in modern society. We will talk about marrying for the wrong reasons, list the history of marriage as an institution, and if you are want to find out “Should I get married or not?” we will give you 15 reasons why you should consider doing so.
Why Marriage Is Still Relevant in Our Age
So, why is marriage still relevant in our day and age? Why do we keep marrying each other in this busy age of constant movement and tireless work? Why do people still get married?
Well, it’s safer this way. It is easier to coexist together, it is easier to love, it is easier to cope with the harsh realities of life and overcome the issues together.
Marriage makes you healthier. There’s less stress, more peace, fewer unpredictable factors go into play.
It is better to raise a child in a household that has two parents. Otherwise, one parent may not be able to cope with this hard task.
Marriage binds your partner with serious ties that do not allow them to live a romantically free life, thus, they stay loyal to you, there are responsibility and commitment.
Now, let’s talk about marriage throughout centuries, what roles did a married woman and man play throughout human history?
Evolution of Marriage: for What Reason People Got Married Throughout Centuries
So, before we look into the reasons why you should turn your new relationships into marriage, let’s talk about the history of the institution of marriage. In the initial stages of the formation of mankind, there were unlimited sexual relations or hetaerism. Relations of this kind exclude any possibility of reliably establishing a father, in connection with which the origin could be determined only by the female line. Among the peoples of antiquity, according to mother law, women, as the only reliably known parents of the young generation, enjoyed a high degree of honor, which reached full dominance (gynecocracy). Developing this concept, the researchers supported the theory of initial promiscuity (the alleged stage of unlimited sexual relations, which preceded the establishment of marriage and family norms in human society), which later changed to an exogamous maternal gender.
American anthropologist J. G. Morgan clearly distinguished the family from the family, showing that it is an exogamous group between whose members’ marriage is impossible. By virtue of this, members of each genus may enter into sexual relations and marriage only with members of other genera. Exogamy, that is, the requirement to seek sexual partners outside the clan, is a derivative of the prohibition of sexual relations within the clan, which is called the agamic ban, or agamy. In fact, agamy is a prohibition of all generally sexual relations between members of a clan to the same extent, both marital and non-marital, and is the main norm in pre-class societies that regulate relations between genders. In some primitive societies, the prohibition of engaging in sexual relations with members of a kind was combined with the requirement to enter into such relations exclusively with members of one other specific kind. The same requirements were made to its members by this last kind. So, there is a kind of union of two clans, and each of them forbade sexual relations within itself and obliged its members to seek sexual partners in a union clan. Thus, when two matrilineal exogamous tribes (phratries) combine, a dual-genus organization arises.
The dual-clan union is a certain social organization of relations between the sexes, which gives rights and imposes obligations on the parties connected by this union.
The union between certain groups (clans), assuming mutual rights and obligations, acts as a group marriage. Group marriage was the only form of regulation of relations between the sexes. Each clan was a completely economically independent community, the dual clan marriage was dislocated. Under these conditions, a person belonged all their life to the collective in which they were born, i.e., to the one to which their mother belonged. The maternal family, which included all descendants along the female line and existed as part of the genus, designated the period of matriarchy. The essence of matriarchy must lie not in the leadership of a woman but her versatility.
The beginnings of a family way of life as a system of values arose when the life and well-being of individuals depend on the cohesion and life of the primary micro circle of people connected by kinship. In the struggle for existence, human tribes created a social organization focused on the survival of the clan, on the functioning of native structures during generations. The survival of people was a consequence of adaptation of the genus to the environment and a consequence of success in teaching generally accepted forms of life, the assimilation of rules and patterns of behavior. Human groups are forced to adapt to physical conditions and social relations, norms, values, accepted in society. Society always authorizes, makes a choice, prefers the device, the form of the family, determines the composition and internal organization of family groups. In the conditions of group marriage, rights and obligations arose in providing food and raising children, and the parenting function extended to the entire clan and senior representatives. Often a group family relied on the marriage of several sisters with a group of men. In this case, kinship was still considered on the female side since paternity was not established reliably. So, with the advent of childbirth, sexual relations were streamlined, but this did not mean the onset of marriage since marriage implied certain rights and obligations recognized by society. Initially, responsibilities and rights arose with the advent of group marriage.
The potential of group marriage must manifest itself when there are a producing economy and private property, relations of power and subordination, clear social stratification as well as class-group differentiation.
During the era of feudalism in the family, production and economic activity were combined with the educational and professional transfer of knowledge and skills to younger generations, with the strengthening of moral values and religious traditions. These are the main features of the patriarchal family, which was determined by the leadership of a man in solving all issues of life, fixing patrilineality (counting down the male line of kinship and male inheritance law). The psychological nature of the patriarchy expressed the power of the father and the inheritance law of men.
Capitalism has led to a major shift in the development of family relations. The male proletarian, a representative of one of the two main classes of capitalist society, was not the owner of the means of production. He did not have the opportunity to act like an owner in front of his wife and children, which made inheritance unnecessary. The father’s economic relations with children consisted only of the fact that he kept them. As soon as the children became able to work, their dependence on the father disappeared. Under capitalist production, it became possible to sell their labor power not only to men but also to women. Consequently, women had the opportunity to directly engage in the system of socio-economic relations, which led to a change in their position in society and the family.
A woman was able to act as a dependent since independent earnings made her economically equal with a man. The change in the position of women that began in the working-class environment gradually affected all social strata of capitalist society (employees, intelligentsia, etc.), and then affected the whole society. The inclusion of women in the system of socio-economic relations entailed a change in their legal status by the end of the 20th century. Women in all developed capitalist countries have achieved equal civil rights with men. With the change in the position of women in society and the family, the authoritarian power of men and, accordingly, the patriarchal nature of the family began to weaken. The liberation of the family from the influence of property relations and inheritance has become a condition for the legal and actual equality of men and women, who become subjects of marriage choice.
Right Reasons Why You Should Get Married
Most young men preserve their bachelor status in every possible way. But, as statistics show, 80% of free men who are over 25 years old would gladly change their loneliness to warm, family relationships. That's just to admit this desire to their friends and relatives, they are unlikely to find strength in themselves. Some remain single because they can’t find their lady in any way, others suffer from unrequited love, others spend all their free time making a career, but some simply fear family life because they don’t know what awaits them. So, here are the reasons for a man to get married.
1. Marriage is about being treated as a responsible person
Here’s the first of the reasons for marriage. The logic of employers is simple: if a man runs a household, maintains a family, he is motivated to work for two or three, moreover, systematically. He is also by definition distinguished by high tolerance and readiness for progress, bearing the hardships and joys of living and working together in the same family team.
2. Marriage is about being treated as a reliable person
For example, obtaining loans. In general, a family man is given a loan more easily than a bachelor’s. The family man moves faster on a career ladder. Since he has not left his family, he will not leave work. Family psychology is like a religion in which a collective is chosen as God, starting with a small cell in society.
3. Marriage makes you healthier
They are less likely to suffer from cardiovascular diseases, cancer, and prostate. After all, think: together with the family, a man receives three hot meals a day, regular sex and emergency treatment in case of a cold. Judging by the increase in overweight in men, they still use only a spoon and mustard plasters in full force. But can this serve as a rebuke to their spouses?!
4. Marriage is like flying to paradise, with the prospect of a lifetime stay
Why do we get married? Of course, you have to pay for it. But if both spouses work in the family, then the pay is half as much. Savings that are hard to overestimate. Two times faster, the issue of buying an apartment or a car is being resolved. Remember the cherished door that Papa Carlo tried to point out to his son Pinocchio? Now you understand that most likely it was a door to the registry office.
5. Marriage is about love
Are you looking for good reasons to get married? An unconditional argument for women, it rarely comes down to men as an unbridled attraction to the woman of his dreams. Such a man should not be dragged to the registry office. The state of heady love does not last forever.
6. Marriage is about the continuation of love
Despite pessimistic remarks about the fact that marriage is the end of the novel and the beginning of an unbearable life, it marks a new stage in love relationships. It is thanks to marriage that the two halves enter into a partnership and form a whole. Thus, the relationship becomes deeper and more perfect.
7. Marriage is about an improvement in financial affairs
Since childhood, we know that any problem is much easier to solve together. Thus, if both spouses work, this is an additional income to the family budget. As practice shows, for couples, banks are much more willing to give loans, and it is much easier to rent a good apartment.
8. Marriage is about health
Married men are much less prone to breakdowns, stress, and illness than bachelors. Nowadays, there is only one reliable way with which you can deal with stress - this is a warm, family relationship that can only be created with a loving wife. It is she who will always support you and help in difficult times.
9. Marriage is about a long life
American scientists conducted a study in which they found out that married people live much longer than single people. They are much less likely to get sick and are not prone to cardiovascular disease.
10. Marriage is about regular sex
Here’s yet another point on the list of right reasons to get married. Lonely people cannot have sex when they want it. But married can boast of regular sex with a loved one. And this, as you know, is very good for health and well-being.
11. Marriage is about tasty and healthy food
Yes, of course, not every girl can boast of excellent culinary skills. However, you still do not have to eat junk food and instant noodles. And if your wife loves you, she will try to please you, and will soon begin to indulge in fragrant cutlets and delicious homemade cakes.
12. Marriage is about development
Why should I get married? Although many pessimists insist that marriage destroys individuality and limits space, it gives a person a great opportunity to study the facets of their personality. Thus, a person learns the nuances of relationships that help them solve both family and personal problems.
13. Marriage is about the birth of children
Yes, of course, the instinct of fatherhood, in comparison with the mother, is not so pronounced. However, each man dreams of keeping a small copy of his hand, which will fill his gray life with meaning and joy every day.
14. Marriage is about support
Why you should get married? Here’s one of the most important reasons people get married. Married people count on support during a difficult period. After all, they solve all issues together, worry and look after each other. And in an accident, a married person can always count on the provision of medical care. Believe me, in old age it is very important.
15. Marriage is about a clean house
Why do people marry? It’s about comfort and warmth. Let’s agree on something, few men regularly vacuum the apartment and thoroughly wipe the dust. But it’s very easy to imagine a man who is running around the apartment, being late for work in search of his tie. And only a woman can turn a bachelor's den into a beautiful, comfortable apartment.
There are many more reasons why you should marry, there are wrong reasons to get married, but most importantly, you should marry a person you love, then all of the above will become your reality, and you will never regret that you've decided to take this step.