Men falsely claim that women are hard to decode. They say that ladies are cryptic, always send contradicting messages and can get mad for no reason. However, this is not even remotely true. Women are great at sending messages. They think, “Well if you can’t get the memo, the joke is on you!” And this thought has a hint of truth. Women cannot become less mysterious for the sake of men’s ease. Instead, gentlemen need to do their research and know more about female body language.
Eyes are often called a window to the soul. Even the deadliest stare or a flirty wink can tell you more than words. Usually, people’s eyes never have a dazed look, so whenever you look into somebody’s eyes, you can read them like an open book, detecting and knowing how they feel about you.
Do Eyes Never Lie?
Imagine our body system as a power station. Words express only 7% of human intention, sending short waves. But the other 93% is expressed through non-verbal communication, such as hand and leg shaking, hip position, touching the face and, of course, the stare. Knowing this 93 % will give you the Da Vinci Code of scanning humans like a computer. With this knowledge, you can become the mastermind of psychology, reading people in seconds.
NLP masters and behavioral psychologists say that eyes don’t like it. Based on this approach, dozens of books on mind programming were created. Your eyes are a giveaway sign of anxiety, boredom, lust, sleepiness, detachment, addiction, aggression, and so much more.
Real poker pros read gamblers by their stare. The more other players concentrate on keeping a straight face, the easier it will be to call the bluff. Yes, eye language is a real thing, and it is more complex than we thought. So before you hop onto single women sites, reading people's eyes and detecting their body language eye movement on dates, let’s get into some theory to know your math.
Basic Eye Movement for Body Language Decoding
Before becoming Dr. Hannibal Lecter of the dating world, understand that no eye movement body language can equally work in every situation. Consider things like sleepiness, anxiety, and eye twitches that can spoil the overall picture. So if you don’t know how to tell she is flirting, look out for the following signs.
1. Eye openness
Before you learn about eye direction, consider looking at the degree of eye openness in your vis-a-vis. Thus, widely open eyes often indicate sensitivity, dreaminess, and susceptibility. If your date looks at you with eyes wide open, it is a sign she is open to communication, somewhat naïve, or pretends to be that. Half-closed eyes can be an indicator of intense thinking, boredom, arrogance, conceit, indifference, intense fatigue or exhaustion. Closed eyes can tell you about self-isolation, nostalgia, and enjoyment. Squinting glance is indicative of attentiveness, slyness, criticality, callousness, and hostility. Blazing eyes can tell you about flirtatious mood or hinting at something, as well as nervousness and increased excitement or irritability.
2. Eye direction
Eye direction meaning can tell you a lot about your date. For example, if she looks into the horizon, it can tell about her concentration, vagueness, and dreaminess. When a person looks through the partner, this might indicate open disrespect or aggression. A look directed “past” a partner’s face speaks of self-centeredness and self-absorption.
When your date’s glance is concentrated on you, it can show her attentiveness and readiness to have a talk and interact. A respectful and interested lady will want to look you right in the eyes, demonstrating the seriousness of intentions. A person who concentrates vision on a certain random object is, most likely, going through the loop of flashbacks or evaluating a current situation. If your date never looks you in the eyes, that can be indicative of many behavioral disorders, such as ASD and even PTSD.
When you see a girl looking at you with pauses, it can mean that she is distancing herself from a social situation, expressing skepticism and distrust. The other strong sign that can teach you how to read people’s eyes is through looking at them from a distance as well. When you are at the office, bar, or café, notice whether this girl peeps at you. Because if she does, she is at least interested in knowing you better.
Looking up can mean literal admiration. It is also indicative of submissiveness, modesty, and humility. If a girl is tilting her head upwards, trying to stay below your eye level, it is a clear sexual sign of willingness to be handled or hugged. On the contrary, looking down means critical attitude, superiority, true pride, arrogance, and contempt.
Idealistically, a girl should look you right in the eyes during a date without positioning herself lower or higher. That way she shows equality in attitude, adequate adult behavior, and respect. The tilted head can be indicative of shyness, self-consciousness, modesty, and feeling of guilt. It is typical for people who just met to look at each other with heads slightly tilted and glance looking evasive. That way a girl says, “Don’t read me that fast! I am not ready yet!” looking down from time to time to avoid eye contact.
Another thing you should notice is the style of her eye communication. Exchanging glances are indicative of love and respect, as both people alternate eye contact. Fixated eye contact often indicates distrust, mobilization, passive aggression and obsessiveness. A dead stare with squinted eyes is not a good sign. It means that your date feels cold, sadistic or annoyed about you, she wants to resort to sarcasm and hurt you with an uncomfortable stare. A persistent stare with eyes wide open is nothing else than a demonstration of bravery, even if it is fake.
You want to look out for a wandering gaze. When her eyes slowly but surely move from your eyes to a crotch area, no explanation needed. We explore things with our eyes when feeling fascinated, charmed or extremely intrigued.
This is what all false detectives pay attention to. And no, looking in a certain direction does not make a person a liar. But generally speaking, psychologists agree that looking up and to the right can indicate some form of imaginative creation (visual construction) and looking down and to the right can mean anxiousness and kinesthetic imagination.
Looking upwards is indicative of having flashbacks, related to visual memories. A glance at the right often indicates audial construction and a left-sided stare is an audial memory from the past. When a person looks in the left lower corner, it can show that they are having an inner monologue, controlling their words. Finally, a dissociated glance can say about a state of trance or deep disintegration.
How to Read People Eyes in Dating
If you want to know how to read eyes for emotions, you will have to observe people in everyday communication, catching them in different social situations. This is how you can read a girl’s eyes during a date.
1. Look at her pupils. If you have good eyesight, try to catch how wide her pupils are. Generally, the more we like a certain person, the wider our pupils are. If she looks at you with love and passion, her eyes might become darker and acquire a healthy sparkle. The same reaction can be observed in a girl who had some wine or was excited by unexpected news.
2. Look at the area of her gazes. When the communication is strictly social, people don’t like to cross the border (looking lower than the face level). But during an intimate gaze, your date will evaluate every part of your body with a prompt glance from head to toes. People who look at their potential sexual partners especially pay attention to intimate areas.
3. Blinking vs. staring. To be honest, staring at someone is never a healthy decision. It makes the other person uncomfortable and brings comicality to a social situation. What you want to look for in a girl is blinking because people blink when they feel genuinely interested and reverent. There is a term called a “wet eye look.” Again, if you caught your date blinking and catching a glimpse in her eyes, it can be a sign of her adoration. Hopefully, it’s not an eyelash stuck in her eye!
4. Lack of direct looking into the eyes is not always a bad sign. If your girl avoids eye contact, it doesn’t mean she despises you or hides something. When we are shy and self-conscious about how we look, we may hide our eyes from the vis-a-vis. It can be a serious sign of attraction you do not want to miss.
5. Estimate the readiness in the eyes. Glances can go from shy to “let’s go to the bedroom.” It is easy to spot a direct look if you combine stares with physical body movements (legs crossing, wrist touching, etc.) and smile or lack thereof.
Reading people’s eyes is a fun game, but it is a serious practice at the same time. Eye movements don’t mean much if you don’t take into account other factors like mood, state of mind and social situations. But if you want to go on a date and it’s the only arsenal you acquire, this should be a good start.